Friday 6 July 2007

Motivation...

Well, then end of my first week with no treatment and how do I feel? After a great weekend, possibly assisted by adrenalin, I have spent the past few days not feeling too good. Woken up with headaches, stomach pains, feeling sick and very lethargic. I am not sure if I have picked up a bug (not from Amsterdam before you ask) or if it is something that people suffer from after having long periods of illness. I am also finding it hard to get motivated to do anything other than basic requirements and my head feels full of broken biscuits. I am struggling mentally to get my life back on tracks after such a long time of putting things on the back burner and as a result I have agreed with Vicky that I will take advise if I feel the same next week, maybe some counselling will help?
I know that you are not expected to get up and run straight away and that is why you are advised to take periods of convalescing, 4 - 6 weeks in my case, but the fact that this is effecting me is a backward step and one that I will have to get over before I think about returning to work full time. It is very frustrating but I do believe that time is a great healer and hope that this proves to be the case. A bit of dry sunny weather will help, agh the good old British summer again, remember it is Wimbledon week!
I have also been thinking about my blog. I do not want it to become a diary of my life in general as it is about my battle with Hodgkin's Lymphoma and the sooner its over the better. I will only update when there is something relevant to share and as soon as I go into remission, then I will close it once and for all.
Thanks for all of you continuing support and comments.
KYPU....

5 comments:

Unknown said...

Chris,

Thank you for the wonderful comments both you and Vicky have letf on my page. You are an inspiration to me. I'm sure the last couple days havn't felt the best, but I'm sure they will get better and better as the days go on. If you don't mind, I'm going to keep up with your blog until you decide to not blog anymore. Best of luck to you Chris.

Take care,

Jane

Veronica said...

Chris - I'm sorry you're feeling low just now. I personally think it is inevitable. You have been through a life-changing experience and it's going to have taken its toll mentally as well as physically. There is a great thread on the HL forum called 'Post HL Blues' which talks about this - it's common so don't beat yourself up!

Take time, take stock of all that is important and when you're ready you'll be able to move on and live life with more love and laughter than before.......as you said, time is a great healer.........x

Kelly Kane said...

Chris,

I'm feeling the same way you are, it's just going to take us some time to get motivated. I think it's totally normal for us to take a few lazy weeks before we try and rebuild ourselves. And for you they say that radiation builds up and you might feel really tired a week or 2 afterwards, so you're totally normal :)

As for the blog ending soon, that just means you and Vicky will have to start emailing me on a regular basis :) I'm planning on keeping mine up for now, but maybe I'll make a new one when I'm done thinking of cancer things, I'll be sure to keep you posted and make sure to tell me when the blog is officially over!

Talk soon and KYPU! :)

Daz said...

You can expect a few up and downs over the next few months matey, after all we've been through hell and thats takes some getting over - people have been telling me I won't be completely my old self for another year!! Although I'm pretty good at the moment I've still got the daily twinges in my biopsy site which always get the old ticker racing 'til I convince myself that its just normal to get these feelings and that everything is still tickety boo. Headaches, upsets stomachs - been there, gonna be back there too but I'm sure that time (as you say) will sort it in the end.
Take care
Daz.

P.S. Genesis, superb man!

Anonymous said...

Well Chris,

Its now Tuesday, and its only this morning that I feel better from Saturday!! When did I become such a lightweight on the wine????

You drank all that ammaretto with Clive and you were still standing?????

Take things easy and follow your gut instinct on what you should do as regards to what happens in the future for you.

Love Rachael x